Trees and Pants

The Third Day of Advent Little Known Factoid About Me is that I became a football fan to have something in common with my Pop. I will always remember him trying to explain the game to me: "See, you have four downs to make 10 yards." Downs? What means this "downs"? It took quite a while for me to get that a "down" was a "chance." Once I got that down (heh), I picked up... Read more →

Tights Are Not Pants: Purple Edition

Today was public transportation day. Joe had to be at work (YES! WORK! More on that later.) at the ass crack of dawn (5:30 am, to be precise) and he worked until the last light of day (okay, not quite -- 6:00 pm). So, I had to rely on my legs, the subway, and the bus to: get to work -- short walk, express bus, subway, company shuttle get to the dentist -- longer walk,... Read more →

Pull Up Your Goddamn Pants: Heat Wave Edition

Sometimes things just fall (heh) into place. I was riding up the long Metro when young man went sprinting up the moving stairs. I saw that his jeans were cinched around his thighs and his drawers were hanging out, but I was not about to follow him up the escalator. So I chalked it up to be "one that got away." It happens. Then when I got to the Metro entrance, voila! There he was,... Read more →

Pull Up Your Goddamn Pants: Boardwalk Edition

Droopy drawers on the Ocean City Boardwalk? It's like shootin' fish in a barrel. These guys stopped to chat up these young ladies, and I couldn't resist getting a shot of this three-layer droop. Look closely -- plaid under an island motif under camo. Points for creativity! Then there's this long drink o' water -- the classic saggy jeans over bright red undies. The matching red bandanna lends a certain je ne sais quoi to... Read more →

Pull Up Your Goddamn Pants: Close Up Edition

Yes, right in front me on Metro. A stripe-ass fellow with droopy drawers. He and his girlfriend were cuttin' up all the way from my gettin'-on stop, and he was intruding into my sacred seat space by draping his arm way over the seat. So, when he got up to get off the train.... Well, karma can be a bitch. Welcome to the internet! Sag Factor: 8.5 Location: Rhode Island Avenue Metro Read more →

Tights Are Not Pants: Variety Edition

I have been quite remiss in posting examples of my latest fashion headshake, to wit: Tights are not pants. So, rather than post them one at a time, here is one big ol' collection of them. 1. Shades of the 80s -- the big shirt over tights. Comfortable, yes; pants, no. Oh, and the woman behind her? Those are actually jeans. Extraordinarily tight jeans, but jeans nonetheless. Location: Minneapolis-St. Paul airport. 2. The paint splatter... Read more →