Meet Little Bits
Pull Up Your Goddamn Pants: Platform Edition

Exempt Sunday Stealing

Well, I spent most of today working on my Project from Hell.

Yeah, on Sunday. Goddammit. The Underlord loves to remind us that we are exempt employees, so we have to work "until the work is done", which is her way of saying "work more! work more! work more!"

So here's this week's Sunday Stealing; appropriate for the first day of fall. Happy Autumnal Equinox!

First of all, is autumn your favorite season? Why or why not?
It's my second favorite, actually. I love the cooler touch of the breeze, the turning of the leaves, and the smell of wood smoke. I hate the period from Halloween to Thanksgiving; it's cold and dank and dark, and you know that it's only going to get colder and darker.

Is it ‘autumn’ or ‘fall’, to you?
Fall, mostly.

What kind of weather does your area get during this season?
It can be spectacular! Today was pretty close to perfect, for example. The sky is a deep blue, the heat and humidity are gone gone gone, and the air is crisp and cool -- until November. 

Were you born in an autumn month?
Nope. I'm a January baby.

Do you pay attention to any ‘fall fashions’?
I rarely pay attention to any fashion. (Saggy pants and tights-as-pants are not fashion in my book.) To me, fall fashion means my Caps jersey!

Which leaf color is your favorite?
Bright orange, fading dark red.

Is it still fun to rake the leaves and jump in piles of them?
No. I would most likely hurt myself if I jumped in a pile of leaves.

When can you really tell that it’s autumn?
When I can turn off the air conditioning and sleep with the windows open under a blanket.

Do you enjoy carving pumpkins?
Yes! I haven't done it recently, but I do enjoy it. My favorite carving was one of the Punisher skull. One little trick-or-treater actually told me that it was very scary!

Do you eat the pumpkin seeds? If so, do you put any kind of flavoring on it?
I did when I was all health food crunchy granola back in college.

Are you planning to go to a pumpkin patch this year?
Nope. If we get around to it, we'll pick up a pumpkin or two at our favorite farm stand.

Which was your favorite Halloween costume to wear?
I loved wearing a really cute showgirl costume that I acquired when I was working for a circus. It was sequined and sexy!

Are you planning to go trick-or-treating? Why or why not?
No. I think someone would probably call the cops. We'll give out treats to all the little princesses and monsters that come to our door. Oh, and the teenage thugs that come around a little later.

Are there any county fairs or festivals held nearby during this time?
Well, Burtonsville Day was yesterday, but we missed it. If I'm honest, we've always missed it.

What is your favorite dessert for this time of year?
The best pumpkin pie in the whole entire world.

Is your Thanksgiving Day in October or November, if you even celebrate it?

If you do celebrate it, where do you usually have Thanksgiving dinner?
For years, we had it my mom's house, then we had it at my cousin's house. Last year, we had it at our house, and it was just Joe and me. This year, maybe we'll go to Ocean City and have a feast there!

Do you remember any crafts you used to do that were autumn-themed?
We always did them in grade school, but now It's Decorative Gourd Season, Motherfucker!

Are any of your favorite bands doing a fall tour this year?
Not that I know of.

Which new TV show are you looking forward to this season? 
Brooklyn 99.

How does autumn typically make you feel?
Pretty good, until the seasonal affective disorder kicks in.

What color do you always associate with autumn?

Is there a song that always reminds you of this season?
Not really.

Do you have any seasonal traditions?
Making the Best Pumpkin Pie in the Whole Entire World.

Do you spend a lot of time outside during this time of the year?
Yes. More than in the summer!

How can you tell that fall is over? 
When I have to walk through freezing rain in the dark. Then it's winter.

What is a typical autumn outfit that you wear?
Comfy pants, long-sleeved shirt, fleece hoodie -- and a Caps or Redskins jersey.

Describe a perfect autumn day: 
Blue sky, multicolored trees, cool breeze, and nothing to do but enjoy it.

Do you hate it when stores start promoting Christmas early?
Yes. Christmas season starts the day after Thanksgiving!

What is your favorite thing about this season?
The cool, crisp air. It energizes me.