Boxing Day
Goodbye, 2010

Gnashing Of Teeth

Well, I'm a little under the weather. I've had this weird ache in my head -- it feels like someone pinching the bridge of my nose.

I suspect that I ground my teeth to a fare-thee-well last night. I know why, too. It was because I had a pretty vivid dream.

Do you ever have "theme" dreams? I mean, dreams that might differ in the details but have the same general feeling or progression? I have a few: Angry Yelling dreams, Stuck on Steps dreams, Anxiety about Events dreams. And in the last year, Mom dreams. (Go figure.)

I had this particular dream between six and eight this morning. I woke up early, but since Joe was working the late shift and I'm on vacation, I rolled over and went back to sleep.

The dream was both a Mom dream and an Angry Yelling dream. At first, the dream was that I was helping Mom move into assisted living. One of old men tried putting the moves on her, but she was having none of it.

Then the scene morphed. I was in the assisted living office and the accounting person was trying to get me to pay Mom's bill. She said I had to pay it, but I could set up a payment plan. I got really angry and said that I could only pay $1 a week because that was all I could afford, and anyway, what was this payment for?

The accountant said it was for my Mom's maintenance.

I yelled, "But she's DEAD! What kind of maintenance could she possibly need?"

And then I woke up.

So yeah, Angry Yelling Mom Dream, accompanied by gnashing of teeth.

I suppose I might experience some more of these sorts of dreams as the anniversary of her death approaches. It is, I'm sure, a sort of a psychic working out of missing her and moving on.

I'd best be sure to wear my nighttime mouth guard.