Church Street: The Prayer Stop

Why Can't I Think Of The Snappy Comeback When I Need It?

I have written before about my extreme dislike of street solicitors, regardless of the cause, whether it's Jesus, PETA, plain old begging, Greenpeace, Democrats, Republicans, conspiracies, whatever.

Tonight it was The Environment. I don't know for sure which organization the overly friendly guy was representing because I blew right past him on my way to the subway.

I knew I was in trouble when I spotted him standing by the stairs, clipboard clutched firmly in his mitt.

GAAAAHHHH! DON'T MAKE EYE CONTACT!!! I screamed to myself.

Too late.

He blared out the McDonald's theme and called out, "Hi! What's your favorite planet?"

I mumbled something like, "Sorry, not tonight."

Of course, I should have said something clever, like:

  • Mercury, because it's hot, hot, hot!
  • Uranus, because you have your head up it!
  • Venus, because it rhymes with penis.
  • I don't have a favorite; I love all my planets equally.
Any other suggestions?