The New Blak

Yesterday I tried my first Coca-Cola Blak.

I read about it on another blog that I surfed to from the Holidailies, and of course I can't for the life of me remember which one it was. (But thanks to Annie in Austin, now I know!) So to the very nice and talented person who wrote that entry Cinemagypsy, thanks and my apologies for not taking notes.

Anyway.

Our cafeteria had it in stock. You don't get a lot in a bottle, just eight fluid ounces. The bottle is a throwback to the traditional glass Coke bottle, but it's covered with a skin-tight wrapper. Very moderne, quite chic and with it, as soda bottles go.

The tagline on the wrapper reads "Carbonated Fusion Beverage". Wow. A fusion beverage. Fusion? This must be quite the marketing hype, I thought to myself. I mean, fusion in a beverage? What, exactly, is being fused in the Coca-Cola Blak?

I'll tell you: it's Coke and coffee. Folks, I'll repeat that: Coke. And coffee. Fused. Along with high-fructose corn syrup and a few other scary sounding chemicals. How could I not like this? I mean, really -- Coke, my favorite soda in the whole entire world, and coffee, my favorite staple beverage in the whole entire world.

Here's what the official press release says:

"We believe we have created a new category of soft drink -- an adult product in a carbonated beverage -- and a whole new drinking experience. This brand is ideal for any part of the day when people are looking for renewed energy or simply to take a break," said Marc Mathieu, vice president, Global Core Brands, The Coca-Cola Company.

All right. Got that? A whole new drinking experience?

Not only that, it's only 45 calories, not bad for a non-diet soda. I took the first glug and immediately thought, "Oh, gross!" But right after that, I thought, "Well, maybe not... it's kind of... good."

I had the same reaction on the next glug, with less gross and more good. I thought, "It's a deeper flavor, like burnt caramel with fizziness? No, not nearly as icky as that. It's like... coffee... but not." I had to take another glug. Hmm. I found myself nodding, "Good. Okay, I think I like it." And after I knocked off the rest of it, I thought, "Why yes, it is a whole new drinking experience!"

Then I noticed that I was feeling quite peppy. Indeed, I was practically energetic! This stuff is better than Mulliner's Buck-U-Uppo! Woo! Look at me, I'm productive! Interactive PDF evaluation form, done! Edits to e-learning course, done! Emails, answered! Yowza!

Of course, the fact that the stuff is full of coffee extract and caffeine might have something to do with this.

I believe further research is warranted.