I Think I Need Some Magnesium

Ten Things I Could Use Right About Now

  1. A nap. Joe's taking a sabbatical down in Ocean City, so I've been sleeping/not sleeping in the guest room, where there is cable TV. Unfortunately, there is also a lot of traffic noise, which has been waking me up way too early for getting up but way too late for useful falling back to sleep. Therefore, I am grumpy.
  2. A friendly kitty. I miss my kitty. She was excellent at lowering my blood pressure. Of course, she was also excellent at raising it, but for now I'm concentrating on her blood pressure lowering powers. She had the best purr, too.
  3. Clean underwear for tomorrow. Joe is the laundry expert in our house. I suppose I will have to venture into the Cave of the Machines, pay tribute, and throw in a load.
  4. A literary agent. With a great big cash advance. On All Things Considered tonight was the story of Yet Another Young Phenom, who snagged a half-million dollar advance at age 17 on the strength of her novel idea (idea!), and then proceeded to pretty much plagiarize another writer. This makes me grind my teeth just a little.
  5. A big bouquet of lilacs, for they are the best smelling spring flowers on earth, and smelling them makes me very happy and calm and prevents tooth grinding.
  6. A good swift kick in the muse. Maybe if I finished the damn sequel and actually sent out a few queries, I could achieve number 4. Or not.
  7. A haircut. And highlights! I'm in Hair Hell.
  8. The magic super-instant weight-loss pill. What? It doesn't exist? Well, damn.
  9. A band of groupies. Sycophants will do.
  10. A good joke. Tell me one!