So I had extra-special bloodwork and a bunch of CAT scans this week. Good times!
And, because I am nosy, I kept checking the patient portal to see the results. And, because I am nosy, I couldn't resist reading them when they appeared.
Did you know that my brain is unremarkable? And all this time I thought I was remarkable! In fact, many of my organs are unremarkable or "normal for age". This is actually fine by me.
However, it seems that pretty much all of my lymph nodes are moderately embiggened. To be precise:
That's just my neck, mind you. Also, surprise! The biggest one is on the left, not the right (which is the one they found on the mammogram). Now let's add to the fun:
Okay, so I have a lot of enlarged lymph nodes. But... wait a sec...what the hell?
Number 2 says that I, in addition to all of my bigly lymph nodes, have a "mass" in my left ovary. Not only that, an adnexal mass. Not only that, a mixed adnexal mass. Lucky me!
Because I have a difficult time restraining my mind from jumping immediately to worst-case scenarios (Oh crap ovarian cancer), I copied these results and sent them off to my handsome and talented physician's assistant brother. He called me pretty quickly and talked me off the ledge by telling me that it's highly likely that it's just a cyst and nothing to worry about. Moreover, even though the lymphoma is traipsing around all over the place (I have visions of lymph nodes doing a sort of Fantastic Voyage bar crawl through my innards), "Watchful Waiting" is still most likely to be the treatment.
About an hour later, my primary care physician (hereinafter referred to as "Doc V") called, just to check on me. He's been following the whole drama from the first mammogram and he wanted to make sure I was doing okay. "I know you're probably overwhelmed by this," he said. I thought, "I'm not overwhelmed. I'm fine. I'm just fine." We talked about it a bit and he, too, reassured me about "Watchful Waiting." Doc V then told me I could call and talk any time. That made me a little misty! What a good doc!
And when we hung up, I suddenly realized that yeah, I kinda am overwhelmed by all of this, and I'm really not all that fine, but it's okay. It's kind of a relief to admit it. So there you go.
Anyhow, I see my oncologist (Doc S) next Wednesday. I suspect that if my Mixed Mass (Mixed Mass -- sounds like a diverse religious ritual) was something that was going to kill me immediately, she'd call me. As it is, it's tops on the list for discussion. I see more tests in my future "for further characterization."
Speaking of "characterization," I must remember to set up the DVR to record The Brain That Wouldn't Die, aka Jan in the Pan!